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Not so happy Father’s Day

One year ago on Father’s Day, Saitaomei was so small, chubby and cuddly.

Aiyoh so cute. Hello mei mei. Still hanging on to her favourite xiu xiu.

Papa and Saitaoha on Father’s Day last year.

No pictures this year because Saitaomei is really sick! She spent the whole night screaming and wailing and this continued today. She runs a fever on and off and is off her food. I was worried enough to bring her to the doctors, something that I hardly do when she gets sick because I know the doctors can’t prescribe her anything for common colds and flus. The doctor said it might be the on start of a viral infection?

A miserable, wet and windy Father’s Day. But Happy Father’s Day R and my dear ah pa! I don’t say it near enough but you’re worth your weight in gold and I really appreciate all that you do for the family. The kids love both of you to pieces 💕💕💕

Easter trip – Dunsborough

What terrible weather for our Easter road trip!

Didn’t dampen Saitaoha’s excitement though :). She’s been asking me everyday whether she can ‘go on holiday yet?’ Please mummy please….’ finally I could say yes today and she went ‘yeah!!!’

Our air bnb house is really quite nice with great family areas, it’s a pity the weather is so crummy or else we would be walking to the beach nearby.

Mushroom risotto for dinner cooked by my trusty Phillips all in one cooker. We wanted something easy to cook and this hit the spot.

Breaking out the snacks flown from the United States. It is really fun being all together. I’m looking forward to tomorrow already.

We have a babysitter in Aunty Peggy, she’s like a pied piper, all the kids adore her and follow her everywhere.

Now that we’re on the way back home, it is safe to say that the best day of our holiday was the first day :S. I think our downfall was my stupid attitude of trying to please everyone but ending up pleasing no one. It’s something that I have a habit of doing and I’m kicking myself for it. R didn’t help of course, at times I feel like I have three children, with him being the most petulant and childish one! It’s when I’m reminded how different our upbringings and characters are. Trying periods but we get through them as we always do.

Very impressive sandcastle, other little kids came along to help decorate too, so cute.

We lost our hearts to the beach just 5 mins walk from our place.

It was breathtaking in the evening and during sunset.

Hehe little Saitaomei got to dip her feet in the cold waters. She loved it of course.

More sandcastle building for the dynamic duo. She was like LG’s little shadow throughout the holiday.

The pinks and blues 💕.

The winery that nobody wanted to go to except me 😓.

But at least Jiu Jiu scored a happy picture with Saitaomei! He has been trying to win her heart the whole trip and semi succeeded.

Happy at The Berry Farm playground with her heroine. The farm was a disappointment and I wish we didn’t go, it wasn’t the season for berry picking and everyone was tired after the long drive.

The scones were good though.

Their signature beef and red wine pie was bad, even R was struggling to finish it.

Mei mei enjoyed running around the playground.

It felt like these long windy roads were a huge part of the trip. Why is everything in Perth so far from each other? We need to have better planning systems.

This was the highlight of Saitaoha’s holiday, the countless amount of Easter egg hunts she had, I feel she will remember it for years to come.

Very serious this Easter egg hunting activity.

Mei mei had some Easter egg hunt fun too. I still remember when Saitaoha was too small to understand the Easter egg hunt that her cousins had so much fun with, she’s grown up so much.

I am so much less patient with her compared to her mei mei. Because she is bigger I expect so much more from her, it’s pretty tough for this three year old. During the holiday I scolded her for not eating her food properly and told her she was not going to the beach. She’s a stubborn one too, she sat at the bottom of the stairs sadly but refused to speak to me.

Then she told my ah ma ‘Mummy is so naughty, she so bad to me’. Woes of being a mummy. She doesn’t look for me for comfort or tenderness, it’s her mah mah that she looks for. Sigh what to do.

They’re so cute together. One all encompassing in her love for her jeje, jeje basking in the adoration from her loyal fan.

It was lovely being able to spend time with my family even though there were only brief quality moments.

Like the walk to the shops with ah ma and Saitaoha in the stroller.

The supper of Maggi Mee that we all had during our last night. We were not really hungry, I think we siblings just wanted to do something together. Like the old days when we had roadside burgers at our family home together, everyone had one even though I was really the only one hankering for a sloppy burger.

Then there was the dark walk to the shops with my siblings after some beach activity. It was fun walking in the darkness, teasing each other and laughing at our own jokes.

It wasn’t an easy or perfect family holiday, but the little pockets of gold are enough to sustain me till our next holiday.

Birthday

I’m rushing to blog about today before the clock strikes midnight in 15 minutes and my birthday is over.

I realised it was my birthday around 2am and gave my sleeping Saitaomei a kiss on the forehead. My daughters are the best gifts for me, and how nice it was to spend the first hours of my birthday with my baby.

I was pottering around the kitchen when I noticed a box and a card on our dining table. My present from R! A custom designed keep Cup for the coffee addict. I love it! I’ve been wanting to get a keep cup for ages but was lamenting to R that they’re all either really ugly or ridiculously overpriced. So he custom designed a pastel coloured one for me :).

Jo was so lovely to bring me and the kids out for shopping at Carousel. The kids had a great time and so did I.

We over indulged in a very Malaysian brunch but hey, that’s what birthdays are for right? It was all rather yummy and felt like a treat.

Hahaha. Caption this photo.

She loves being in the driver’s seat, she made her own vroom vroom sounds, shooo cute.

This two have a hilarious love hate relationship. When they’re together they are always squabbling, but when they’re not together, they’re always asking for each other 🤷🏻‍♀️.

We had Mexican for dinner, delicious and easy. Tristan was the cutest kid, he said ‘this is a good choice for a restaurant yee yee’. Why thank you my dear nephew.

Saitaomei having lots of fun with her yee yee.

Then it was cake time but no decent photos because my daughters’ eyes were all on the cake! They take after me my foodie girls.

It’s my niece’s birthday today and she seems to have had a great time in Singapore. The funny girl has been sending me photos of these celebrity ambassador displays. They were laughing at my new hobby of watching K dramas, at first it was just displays of Korean actors but now its morphed into something more 😂. May we continue celebrating our birthdays feeling loved and spoiled by our loved ones dear LG.

It was such a lovely and fun filled birthday which now I’m paying for because I’m doing such last minute packing for our early flight out tomorrow! I so wish I could pack my sister and nephew with us SIGH. But I shall buy them many treats to make up for it.

Throughout the day I kept getting birthday messages from my nearest and dearest. I switched off my birthday notification on Facebook a few years ago because I didn’t see much meaning in getting messages of ‘hb’ from acquaintances. So if someone messages me now, I know they somehow remembered my birthday and bothered to make an effort to send me a birthday wish.

I felt so touched and happy, because the messages I received were from special people who are so close to my heart. Some of us haven’t been in contact for years, but they’ve always been in my thoughts, and I guess, I’ve been in their thoughts too. My heart felt so warm and fuzzy because it felt so nice to know that the people I love and hold a special place in my heart, remember me and are thinking of me too.

Happy birthday to me, and hopefully many more happy days to come.

Working from home

Working at home today but really I feel like this 👇

She looks very comfortable hor? She stayed there for ages watching tv, such a tv addict sigh.

I’m afraid for both R and I. Saitaoha has been having a cold for ages and now both of us have sore throats 😭. Please ah I cannot afford to get sick, I’ve utilised too much sick leave in 2018 sigh.

Getting better ???

Just wanted to jot down that I felt better today and could walk a bit!

I could play with this little girl.

And hang out with my tamchiak bubba too!

Best day in a long long while.

Prayer

You know every year when you write up your yearly recap and say ‘this was one of the most difficult years I’ve had’, I won’t be writing that this year because this is hands down THE most difficult year I’ve had in my entire life to date.

It was/is a particularly bad night tonight. I’ve been in agony for the best part of the night. At one point I googled ‘prayers to take away pain’. I’m at my wits’ end, can you tell?

I’m in so much pain, please have mercy on me.

Magic window

Yelled at Saitaoha today.

Almost yelled at R too. Why is my family so reliant on me?!

😭😭😭. I just wish my parents were back already.

***

Everyday I’m like Cinderella and have this small window when the fairy godmother waves her wand and I magically feel better and can function like a human being. During those magical hours, I cook a simple dinner, feed the kids (who also magically change from their refusing to eat selves to become foodie angels), bathe Saitaoha and play with the kids.

For a few hours I feel sane, normal and like a mother and wife again. I’m able to joke with R, eat my only meal for the day and prep for the night ahead. Saitaoha loves this magical time the best, for a short time, she gets her mummy back. I hope kids have short term memory and if I get past this ordeal, that she is able to forget her barking mad, snapping and teary mummy who is either groaning in pain or gasping in tears.

***

I love showering with Saitaoha, it’s our girly ritual.

When I wipe her down with her bear hoodie towel, she always giggles and says ‘hi mummy bear!’

‘Hi Saitaoha bear!’ I replied.

‘I’m not Saitaoha bear, I’m baby bear!’ she said today.

‘Oh ok, hi baby bear’ I said

‘Wah Wah Wah’ Saitaoha fake cries like a baby.

‘What happens when mummy bear cries ?’ I asked her suddenly, thinking of the tears this morning.

She stops play acting and looks at me seriously. She reaches out her little hands and caresses my face ‘Don’t worry mummy bear, it’s ok…’

Then she gave me a kiss and a hug.

Thank you Saitaoha, mummy bear really needed that today 💕💕💕.


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