Was attempting to finish up some work from home tonight but have kinda given up because the work laptop doesn’t seem to want to give me access to my work files anymore. Hopefully I can bring myself to wake up super early tomorrow so I can be in the office before everyone gets there. Nowadays I hardly get any desk time because my phone is either always ringing, or people will stop by to ask questions or it’s meetings…
Can’t believe (actually quite predictable lah I go through this every year) that I’m back in my vicious work cycle of wondering what the hell I’m doing and thinking about quitting again. I never go through with quitting though (especially with the horrendous job market at the moment!), just being a drama mama as usual. I do irritate myself with my melodrama.
When things are tough at work I always have a lot of self doubt. Am I stressed because I don’t handle stress well? Am I overworked because I should be able to time manage better? Is it a case of working harder and not working smarter? Why can’t I be one of those people who somehow manage to blame the chaos around them on other colleagues and pat themselves on the back at the same time?
It’s particularly ironic this year that I’ve joined a mentor program and am someone’s mentor! And my mentee is brilliant! Almost feel like I have to pretend to be someone clever and capable so she won’t think she’s been conned into this program. But so far our sessions have been very honest and I’ve pretty much shared my struggles, experiences and learnings with her. I hope she gets something out of these sessions and it’s not a complete waste of her time. Poor mentee.
Ok better go to sleep or else I can wave my plans of going to work early goodbye!
daitaoha 