1.16 am

Woke up from a vivid dream where the family reunited with my brother in Kuching. We all cried when we saw each other, uncontrollable tears seeping out of our eyes, and I knew we were so sad that we had grown so old, that we had spent so many years and moments apart without each other, him in the US, the rest of us here in Perth. During this time life has gone on, the kids have grown bigger, us siblings have aged and our parents have grown older, life has flashed by, too many days, months and years of us not being together.

In the dream we were so happy to see each other again but we were also so sad because we mourned the days that we had been so far apart from each other, because we knew we would eventually part and miss each other all over again.

I woke up with tears in my eyes and couldn’t fall back to sleep because my heart was aching so much. I wanted to call my brother and ask him to join us in Australia, to not be apart from us for so long. But I knew I wouldn’t do it, can’t do it, and ended up just sending him a WhatsApp message asking how he’s been.

We’re so lucky that after having spent so much time apart from each other, us siblings scattered in different areas parts of the world, my parents back in Kuching, to be able to reunite and spend the rest of our lifetime with each other. My daughters are so blessed and lucky to grow up basking in the love of their grandparents, aunties and cousin. The missing link is my brother.

Most of the time we don’t feel it, we talk about him and my sister in law all the time, my parents set aside a bedroom in their house for when they visit, we send him photos of our family gatherings, of the kids. We talk about visiting him in the US. It’s all with happiness and not a hint of sadness.

But I guess in my subconscious, in my dreams, my inner sadness surfaces, and I just miss him so so much. It’s crazy because I’ve spent more than half my life away from him and in Perth, you would think not being with my brother was the norm, but I still miss him and wish we could be together again.

Heartache at 1.16am in the morning. Sigh.

Easter feast

My Easter bunnies are too cute 🥰. They’ve really been enjoying the Easter holidays so far.

There was so much yummy home cooked food today, we had Sarawak laksa, char kueh, stir fried clams, orh jieb substitute with prawns. It was all delicious hawker street fare prepared by ah ma and myself (hc cooked the clams which were delish) for my BIL’s birthday family gathering.

I’m so glad I don’t have to return to work this week, I suspect I will still be doing some work and I really need to work on job hunting but it’s still nice to not have to dread waking up and getting ready for another gruelling day of office politics. Hooray for holidays.

Easter city staycation

Our last minute decision to book a staycation in the Perth CBD was a great idea.

The kids were so excited when they found out and we had such a good time!

The hotel wasn’t fancy but it was comfortable and clean and the location was great for us.

They only heat the pool in winter so it was too cold for Saitaomei!

Saitaoha was game thought and we had two fun days of icy swimming haha.

My beautiful first born is growing up way too fast for me.

We even spent some time at their gym, I’m amazed the kids managed to self entertain.

The kids had cup noodles for the first time and enjoyed it tremendously.

My favourite part of the staycation was exploring the city at night with my family.

We took lots of pictures

I hope they remember this when they grow up, weekends of exploring the city with their parents.

The Perth city library is a favourite place for us.

It is remarkably beautiful.

The kids favourite floors is the round play area with all the dogs.

So many wombats!

My little girls

We had lovely food throughout the long weekend, there was our trusty pho from Viethoa.

I haven’t had broken rice for a long time, it was delicious.

Hakata chicken ramen was really nice too, R loves ramen and he enjoyed it a lot.

Luckily our girls are big noodles lovers too.

The girls had desserts for both days, the first night was Maccas sundaes, tonight we had shaved ice from Dessert Garden.

If you ask them they will say their favourite part of the holiday was the ice creams !

Making memories with R and my beautiful daughters, I will only have these golden days for a short time and I’m cherishing every single moment with them. I love you Saitaoha and Saitaomei

City Day Out

Another Sunday in the city. I wonder whether this is a memory that the girls will grow up with. I have fond memories of Sundays with my family, ah pa starting the car and asking us where we want to go for breakfast. We always said ‘chin chai’ and ended up going for bak kut teh or another kopitiam called yuen nan yuan for laksa, kueh chap and char kueh. We had our favourite kopitiams that we always rotated, our current favourite is ah biao’s, sigh I miss ah biao kopi.

Saitaoha went up a swimming level woohoo! They are doing so well swimming, I’m going to start her on piano lessons after Easter, I hope she enjoys it too.

Their favourite activity in the city is actually sitting on the bus! Saitaomei likes to have a seat on her own, my funny little Miss Independent.

Looks at miss poser Saitaoha! Where do kids learn things like that ?

They squabble so much but have so much fun together too. We have such lovely weekends together that it makes Mondays so difficult. Which reminds me, I should really book my Easter holidays so I can hang out with them. I wish COVID was over so I could bring them to fun public places.

Sigh there goes another glorious weekend 😭.