Archive for December 7th, 2018

Saitaomei visits

Ah ma and ah pa (and Saitaomei) came to visit me this evening!

It felt so good to see my munchkin. Even though this foodie was more interested in getting mum mum than mummy 😅. She’s happy and safe with my parents, I know she is because my parents are the best parents in the world. But I felt so bad for making them worry and also the extra work I’ve put on ah ma with having to take Saitaomei for the night. It’s really hard if you don’t get enough sleep at night, I know how terrible lack of sleep feels, so I know how ah ma must be exhausted.

Why won’t my leg heal?! So many people need me! R has been a trooper, like ah ma put it, he’s pretty much our 阿四, he looks after Saitaoha, makes me hot drinks and toast, preps my ice packs, does all the housework, I’m sure he is missing his active wife but he hasn’t said a word of complaint and does things merrily and willingly. It makes a huge difference.

I just really want to get well already, pretty please?


4am musings

Will I never walk again? Will I be wheelchair bound ?

What if the injection never settles? How long till you determine that it hasn’t worked ?

All the doctors, nurses are so blasé and nonchalant about the situation. It’s as if they’ve seen so many cases of the same thing, that they don’t really care anymore. But what if my case is different? I don’t whinge about pain until it really really hurts. If I’m bed ridden, it means it really really hurts. Surely that’s not normal ?

Will things ever be normal again? Will I be able to look after my children and be with them again ?

I miss Saitaoha and Saitaomei so much. I miss my parents too. I miss myself.

December 2018
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